Finally found a place in Eastham. Cheap, considering the average range ($7-900) for a studio or 1BR. As predicted, this housing search was indeed interesting (& long). Will be transporting things over there bit by bit during the week. True to form, I've put off packing until pretty much the last minute. Did tons of laundry on Saturday & put a bunch of stuff in boxes, as well.
I can't remember the last time when life felt so tenuous. Am currently seeking other work as the current web contract is being put on indefinite hold due to funding issues. While there are more jobs around (summer), the amount of professional work similar to my current position is small. Mostly finding temp/contract stuff in Boston here & there, but nothing concrete yet.
A real element of fear exists about my longterm salience living here.
A lack of job/financial security is something I've always faced, but this time it just seems more real . Nevertheless, I press on - looking vigilantly & hoping for the best. Uncertainty is something I've never handled very well. While not the greatest planner, I could usually maintain @ least some (imaginary) sense of control over my circumstances. These days, feels like there's none.
I have absolutely no clue what will happen, & it scares the shit out of me.
So be it - am defying those limiting beliefs, ego conditioning & all the other BS to do what I want anyway. That involuntary lack of abundance stifled my manifestation for years before. Now there's no other option - I must succeed. It's simply a matter of doing what I want & not worrying about the rest.
Am moving ahead w/CG & establishing some steady freelance work in the web/editorial arena. I can't work for someone else while getting paid jack shit anymore. It's my own business or nothing.
Life Intelligence (finally) mandated this decision.
Time for me to follow thru...
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